The Hypocrisy of California

California is almost idyllic for many people. It's beautiful beaches, sun-drenched mountains, amazing cities, and great opportunities. However, how many people know of the precarious foundations this state is built on?

In the course of my studies we have analyzed California every which way, from urban policy and economic innovation, investigating the reasons behind businesses' success, and also the many environmental advancements that are initiated there. The rest of the country often follows in their legislative and regulatory footsteps. While the state could now be considered a spearhead of the environmental movement, its history and many of its current policies are far from preservationist.

The state is one of the highest food-producing states in the country. Most of our fruits, vegetables, meats, or milk products come from California. Yet, if you've ever driven through any part of the state, you have to wonder, WHAT? The entire landscape is a mixture of arid desert, semidesert, or dry plain. One of the many attractions of California is the gorgeous weather, marked by blue sunny skies that are omnipresent. They have two seasons, the rainy and the other, and from March to November the entire state gets little to no rain at all. So, how do they do it, you wonder? Well, I'll tell you (summarizing of course).

During the Great Depression, Roosevelt began many public works projects to employ out of work men. The state of California was a very different place at that point in time, the cities much smaller, the land much drier, and devastating floods countering long droughts made farming difficult, to say the least. But with modern technologies emerging, farmers began to harness the land's natural resources, including a huge aquifer under the plains left from the last Ice Age, untouched until that point. They also decided to harness some of the water from rivers and divert it, building large dams and aqueducts to channel the water to "where it was needed". The government began setting aside money for these irrigation building projects, and water was dispersed to the farms, cheaply and efficiently. In a way, it was better than relying on natural methods of getting water to plants like rainfall, because it could be regulated on the time schedule best suited for the crop to prosper.

This changed the landscape of California from dry plain to blooming field. When you drive through the Central Valley of California now, you can see miles of lush growth, oranges, apples, garlic, even lettuce. But this change is inherently unsustainable. The water from the underground aquifers is being depleted but not replenished, and the water that is diverted from other areas is not enough to sustain the area for an indefinite period of time. So much of the water from these rivers has been diverted to other areas that their routes have been fundamentally changed. The Colorado River no longer runs into Mexico, and is now just a dry riverbed, disconcerting to a country that is in desperate need of drinkable water.

Californians are farming a desert, and many people don't even realize it. Unless you knew about the grand schemes for getting water to the area, it would just look like an idyllic farmland, sunny and lush for mile upon mile. But someday, maybe even in my lifetime, we could see a fundamental shift, if there isn't enough water to go around. Policy-makers will have to come up with new ideas of sustaining the current land-use policies, but none of them will be permanent, and eventually the land will revert back to desert. Bad news for the farmers and the millions of people who rely on the region's agricultural productivity.

This revelation made me wonder how California could be an advocate for so much environmental change and yet allow this to keep happening. It's part of the hypocrisy of the state, which is mimicked throughout the rest of the country: focus on certain issues while ignoring others. It's a matter of convenience; air pollution is a problem for humans, directly detrimental to one's health, and should therefore be dealt with. However, farming makes a huge positive impact on the population, both in terms of the revenue it brings in and the product it sells. It is not economically "responsible" to create restrictions that would reduce the productivity of this breadbasket. However, sooner or later something catastrophic will occur that will lead to a lot of destruction, both economic and environmental. Something needs to be done, but I don't see any meaningful change likely for just the reasons I have listed. It will take a more drastic wake-up call than environmental theories of the future and threats of potential major destruction to incite people to change. And by then it will probably be too late.


As a caveat: this is not to say that California is alone in its hypocrisy. Most states in the US have similar stories they could share, harrowing tales of environmental disasters covered up quietly. In California, however, these problems are seen clearly, and with their almost unparalleled focus on environmental issues, I believe the state has more of a burden to explain itself.

Thankful Thursday

This week has been busy, but next week is so much busier. I'm both excited and sad for the end of the year, because I love the summer, but it also means that a bunch of my friends are graduating and I'll be a senior. It will be weird to come back next year and have all those people I've relied on the past three years not around.

This week, I'm thankful for:

- having something to look forward to. Be it a class, or a meeting, a concert or summertime, anticipation is almost as enjoyable as the actual thing.

- humor. Not only do I love to laugh, I love making people laugh, even if it's at my own expense.

- "being involved". I'm so glad I have the opportunity to do a lot of things, from Soundbytes to Senate. I feel like I'm making a difference, even at the smallest level and I can't wait until I take that to the next step after college.

- being accepted into the Heinz School. Next year I'll be starting my Master's in the accelerated program, which is amazing. I'm one of only five who got in, and it's a pretty prestigious school of public affairs (ranked 8th overall in the country). Not only do I get the opportunity to learn more about my chosen craft, I get to do it at a great school in only one extra year. How cool is that?

- good advice. I tend to ask for advice from friends a lot, and I'm thankful that they give it to me freely, and don't get sick of me asking for it. :)

Carnival Madness

While I don't feel comfortable writing about most of what went on at Carnival in such a public forum as a blog, I still think the long weekend merits at least a comment, if not more.

I spent Wednesday night building booth for Fringe, and by night I mean all night; I didn't sleep until midnight Thursday night. However crappy sleep deprivation is, I think this was a memorable and still fun way to do it. Our booth was themed after the Mousetrap game, and it turned out pretty well. Thursday we had a bomb scare, which was not so fun, but luckily it was nothing. In the wake of the Virginia Tech disaster, the police weren't taking any chances. And lucky for us Carnival folk, they didn't close anything down. That evening I went to see Demetri Martin, who is well-known through The Daily Show. He was hilarious, and I was really glad to have been able to go, since seating was limited.

On Friday, Soundbytes had our annual Carnival concert, and though it wasn't as well attended as I would have liked, a lot of alumni came back to visit, like Dwight and Dave. It was so great to see them both. We sounded good, and sang my first arrangement for the first time. Yay Han Joo, for sounding so good on his first solo! That evening was spent with Fringe people, having a grand olde time.

Saturday I woke up early (after staying up late) to watch buggy for the first time. It was cold but so much fun. It's nice to watch and cheer for the fruits of a year's hard labor. That night was awards, and Fringe did really well. We came in third for our booth, the first time we've placed for booth in several years. Fringe A-team came in second for buggy behind Pika, which we were pretty happy about, and we also won several awards for our buggy design. SigEp won first again for their booth (a Nintendo theme) and Theta won for the sororities (a beehive).

Saturday is the night for parties, since all the buggy folk are done and can stay up late. I spent that night in the way you might imagine (to some extent) a college student to spend it. I watched the fireworks for the first time, with Dwight who finally came by, and it was really fun.

Sunday was reserved for tear down, a depressing show of the wastefulness of Carnival festivities. However, Fringe saved most of the materials used, so it wasn't all bad. I'm sad that Carnival is over, since this was probably the best one I've ever had. I felt very liberated, and I did almost everything I wanted. I have but one regret: I didn't go to Holi on Saturday like I wanted to. It's a paint festival put on by several Indian organizations, and I've wanted to go for a while, but forgot about it at the last minute. C'est la vie. Maybe next year I'll get the chance.

The next week is going to be really crazy-busy, since I didn't do any work over the weekend, and there are only two weeks until the end of the semester. It's shaping up to be very interesting, and hopefully a lot of the things I am hoping for will pan out. Wish me luck!

Thankful Thursday

First of all, I'd like to mark this day as a milestone in my life (sort of). Yesterday I pulled my first all-nighter, granted non-academic, building booth for Fringe. I've only had a short nap in 38 hours, but it was worth it to have accomplished so much, and had so much "fun" in doing it!


There's a lot I'm thankful for this week:

- Being close to extended family. This year has been a tumultuous one for both sides of my family, and I am so thankful to be close to them, both physically and emotionally. Being in Pittsburgh, I'm able to do things with them I never could have anywhere else and be a part of their lives in a way I hadn't been since I'd moved away from the area. They are also so supportive, even more than I had expected.

- New beginnings. Even when things are looking down, there seems to be something, be it a person, an activity, or a object, that helps me cope and find hope for the future.

- Safety precautions and services at my school. In the aftermath of the tragedy that occurred at Virginia Tech (which I was particularly stunned by given that I had lived a half an hour away from there for 7 years) I really appreciate the mechanisms in place to keep my campus safe. While there seems to be very little one can do to prevent these kinds of extreme events from occurring, there is so much at Carnegie Mellon that helps students stay safe in this urban environment. We have recently had our own small scare, which really made me aware of how easily something like what happened at Virginia Tech could happen here ,and how glad I am that there are methods of protection in place for all types of emergencies.

-Fun distractions like booth, Carnival, and parties. I only wish they happened more frequently.

- Welcoming friends. I am so happy to have people around me who accept me into their lives, and actively want me a part of it. And I love returning the gesture.

- Being 20. As much as I might moan about being underage and being locked out of a big part of the social scene of my 21+ friends, I really like being 20. It's a good age, albeit made more of a transitional age, but rather than impatiently wait for my entrance into the realm of full adulthood, I'm going to enjoy these last three months of underage-dom as much as I can. You're only 20 once.

And this is the kind of ignorance I hope to remedy...

It is sad that in these times, people could believe things like this are true. No matter how comic, it reveals an appalling lack of sheer common sense. It did give me a chuckle though. ^_^

Thankful Thursday

I decided to steal this from Ashleigh, who stole it from someone else, who probably stole it from someone else.... but that doesn't mean it's not a great idea. So this week, here's what I'm thankful for.

- free food. I get it a lot, and it makes me happy all the time.
- existentialism
- packages, both the expected and unexpected ^_^
- friend-on-friend therapy sessions
- BOOTH
- music. I'm rediscovering my love for it.
- Korean soap opera
- arts and crafts projects. They are sooooo relaxing.
- springtime. Even though it's cold outside, plants are determined to sprout and get leafy.

Thought-Provoking

At least I think it is. It gave me some perspective.

If tomorrow was the last day of your life, who would you want to spend it with, and what would you do?

Thank You

A lot of you who read this blog know how hard these past few weeks have been for me. I feel like I've started a new phase in my life, and the transition has not been easy. But you have been there for me, from patiently listening and giving innumerable hugs, to expressing words of comfort and support. You got me out of my room (and made me eat) and you told me that everything would be all right. And you know what, you were right. Even though I still have a ways to go, I know I will be okay, because you helped me find the strength I didn't think I had. You have all lent your shoulders for me to cry on, and have been more supportive than I had ever imagined friends could be. For all of this, from the bottom of my heart, thank you.

Think SPRING!

I went for a run today, and despite the fact that it made me even more aware of how incredibly out of shape I am, I really enjoyed it. I never used to like running, but ever since this summer I've missed being able to take an hour and just jog around the city. The weather is finally getting nice enough to be outside. Which brings me to my next point:

SPRING! It's the beginning of Spring here in the lovely 'burgh. The leaves and flowers are starting to come out and people are springing up seemingly out of nowhere (no pun intended). The entire city is vibrant with people walking down the sidewalks, playing frisbee in the parks or just lounging in the sun.

Living in New York, I never got the full springtime experience; we just went straight from winter to summer. This year it's been almost unseasonably warm, in the 70s with clear sky. The only way you can tell it's not summer (or California) are the bare trees. This kind of weather is so valuable in Pittsburgh. Most of the year is spent cold, dark, and snowy. As much as people complain about cold and snowy winters (which I happen to like), they really make you appreciate the good weather when it comes. And you can tell in people's looks; they're happier and more energized because of it. However, this will all change at the end of the week, when we're supposed to be getting snow. :(

Until then, I will be taking advantage of the sun and warmth by spending a lot of time outside. Maybe I'll see you there!

I Think I'm in Love

With Korean soap opera!!! Every time I say that people groan and smile, but so what? It's amazing on its own, although it's better if you have a real live Korean translating for you because the subtitles are completely inadequate. The actors are adorable and hot, the plots are hilarious, and above all, it's just addicting.

I've started watching Goong, translated as Princess Hours, but literally Palace, it's a story about a girl who marries into the crown prince of Korea while still in high school (assuming a lot, since there is no longer a monarchy in Korea). I think it's based on a comic book by the same name, and apparently follows it pretty well. There are a few pretty famous Korean actors and singers in the show, but I'm not knowledgeable about that at all. It's really fun, and I highly recommend it.

In total, I think the show has 24 episodes (each an hour long). We've finished 4. I can't wait to watch more!!

On the Nature and Importance of Relationships

I've been thinking hard recently on the nature of romantic relationships and how important they are in one's life. At this stage in life people are just getting into serious relationships, and for many they are still not on the radar. The, shall we say, unlucky few who must transition from their first serious relationship into singledom again come across two factions: the people who say, in response to your plight, that they're so glad they aren't interested in a serious relationship, or the people who pity you without really being fully aware of the emotional roller-coaster you're on. Perhaps I'm generalizing and glossing over the few who can commiserate with you, and maybe I'm being to hard on the people that just don't know what you're going through, but you just don't know how inadequate that kind of pity, no matter how good-natured, is until you're in the situation yourself. Even then, it might not even be possible to fully understand what the person is going through.

However, this is not meant to be a bash-fest on people who try to help (because they really are great) but a caution to the others, the people who don't recognize the greatness of a committed relationship. I recently had a conversation with some people about this, and they both agreed that they were glad not to be in a relationship because of the potential heartache involved. It was an "I'm so glad I missed that accident" tone. Were they right in thinking that? I thought. Is this type of relationship something to be avoided? Well, clearly the ending of it is, because of the pain. But does the pain of a breakup negate all the good stuff about the relationship preceding it?

Most people would immediately say no, even people who aren't ready to be in a serious relationship now. Everyone has at least some kind of misty-eyed vision of a future love, a committed, happy relationship with the person who "completes you". But do people really think about what it means if that idyllic relationship ends? It hurts, it's a blow to the self-esteem, and it almost never ends how you thought it would. However, people who might want to avoid relationships for fear of the pain of a breakup miss out on so much more. A relationship gives you a chance to grow, emotionally and otherwise. No matter how long or how short, how bad or how good, there is always something to be learned from a relationship, about yourself, about your interests, desires, goals, needs or about how you can better interact with another. Giving up that chance to learn about yourself for fear of being hurt is almost like giving up going to college for fear of being far from home.

A relationship is also more than that. It gives you a feeling of utter elation that can be felt in no other way. It is being almost drunk with love and happiness and doing silly things because of it. It really is one of the best feelings in the world to think the world of someone, and it is something far greater to know that they feel the same way for you.

Relationships end, not always happily, and the longer they lasted the harder it is to overcome the emotion you had and the pain you feel from losing the person that was once so special to you. But the net worth of a relationship is so definitively positive that avoiding it prevents you from experiencing one of the greatest gifts of life.

Don't waste it.

Acceptance :D

Although I found this out on Wednesday, I didn't have time to post. I'd been waiting for an email from the Heinz School notifying me if I got accepted into the Accelerated Master's Program, and I DID! I was getting worried because people had already gotten their letters. Personally, I think it's quite unprofessional to send out the letters over the period of a month or more, leaving people anxious and frustrated when they have sit and hear the good news of other people, feeling their chances sink (in their minds). I was worried that I'd be rejected, and I realized during that time that I had, albeit unconsciously, set myself up to assume I'd be getting the good letter. I hadn't really planned for any alternatives, which I realize now was not the best idea. But it's moot, because I did get in, and am 99.9% sure I'm going. Which means.... that I'll be in Pittsburgh another year. Regardless of people giving their condolences (which I find annoying) I like Pittsburgh and am happy to spend another year living here. I've always had roots here, and I feel like I've grown even more over the past three years. I'm proud to be a resident of this city, and it will be a sad day when I move from it.

My fate being thus determined (at least for the next two years), I felt a surge of relief. On that score anyway. This week was torture, though nearly not as bad as last semester. I had three exams, two over two hours long, and a set of papers due for my philosophy class on Nietzsche and Kierkegaard. It's such a rush when everything is finally done, and you can finally relax.

And by relax, I mean at the BEACH! On Saturday my friends and I are taking a road trip to South Carolina to spend the week bumming around enjoying each other's company. This will be the first Spring Break I've spent with girls. :) Kinda crazy, yeah? It will be a marked change from the last two years, and I think I'm going to enjoy myself immensely (not that I didn't in previous years).

Anxious

Today is the 1st of March, which wouldn't be an eventful day in any other year but this year has given me jitters. It marks the beginning of the end of the interim time between applying to the Heinz School and hearing back from them. In January I applied for the accelerated master's program in public policy, and I knew that I wouldn't hear back before March 1st. However, because it is the 1st, all the anxiety that I had been stoically ignoring in February can no longer be suppressed. It will be such a great opportunity if I am accepted, and I should be hearing back in a week or so! Hence the nervousness. Wish me luck!

Soundbytes L<3VE

Last Saturday night Soundbytes put on a last-minute show with the University of Michigan group Amazin' Blue. They are spectacular, and we had a great time performing with them (at at the afterparty later). Erica, from Counterpoint, was at the concert and was kind enough to video some of the songs we performed. It's not the highest quality, but it's still really cool to see!!!

Drops of Jupiter
- arranged by Melissa, performed by Ashleigh

Short Skirt, Long Jacket/BustAMove
- arranged by Ryan (M.), performed by Matt

Crazy
- arranged by Ryan (M.), performed by Alex

Enjoy!!

Good News/Bad News

Already this week is one big whirlwind. Good and bad things happened today, and I thought you'd like to know:

Bad News:

Ryan just left to go back to California (sad!) very early this morning, and I probably won't see him for two months. There's a larger story to the weekend, but I won't delve into that. However, I did have a lot of fun, and fell in love with salsa dancing and Rolli's grape leaves.

Good News:

For the past week I was getting worried/angry about a homework assignment due for my Monday class because I wasn't sure what it was on without any response back. But today I went to her office hours and found out it's not due until next week. Okay, so it's not a great story, but it's the little joys in life that make it fun. :)

The bigger news is that I got an accepted to be an RA for next year. The process was really long, and the positions are highly sought-after since your housing is essentially paid for. I thought about applying last year, but for several reasons missed the deadline. I'm really glad that I did this year though, because it means that my parents don't have to pay as much in tuition next year, and if I get accepted into the Heinz master's program, I could potentially have my housing paid for in my fifth year if I decide to continue being an RA (which I definitely would).

One other nice thing that I've been anticipating: my brother is coming to stay with me for a few days! He gets the week off (because my high school is weird) and my parents and he will be coming down to spend time with family/me. I've always wanted him to visit, and now he finally is.

Valentine's Day

Most people, and I include myself in this group, think Valentine's Day is a trumped-up Hallmark holiday meant to increase retail sales during an otherwise very dry shopping season. It makes people sad and lonely if they're not with someone and it makes people titchy when they are. A lot of unneeded stress, I say; you have to build romance into the day through gift-giving and money-spending, or you'll have to bear your significant other's irrational wrath because you didn't do so. There is no other significance to V-Day than an excuse to spend more time (and mostly money) on a loved one, and if you really need a day to be more aware of the person you're with, your relationship probably has a problem.

However, recent events and epiphanies have led me to reevaluate this perception of V-Day and give it a bit of a break. Sure its premise is superficial, and a lot of people make fun of it as the "Obligation/Loneliness Awareness Day" because in a sense it has been made into that, but truthfully, we should be able to look past all the hype and at least be glad of the fact that we get a built-in day to remind you to cherish your loved one when perhaps you had forgotten, or are too busy to remember.

In all my experience, the people who gripe about the day the most still, in the end, buy a flower, or a card, or dinner, or even just give a kiss or a loving sentiment for their loved one. The day really isn't so bad or garish after all because you're spending it with a special person. So what if it's there for all the wrong reasons? That's no excuse not to celebrate it for the right ones.

My First Scarf

I've finished my first hand-knitted scarf!!! I'm so proud of myself. Diana taught me when I visited her in New York during winter break, and this is the product of my labor. It's very long, but used less than one skein. Still, I don't have enough yarn left over to make another one, so I guess I'll just have to go buy more! :)

Stories from California

After my lovely New York excursion (see below for details) I flew to California to visit Ryan. Right away I had a bit of an adventure. My layover was in Pittsburgh (oh the irony) and as I got settled into my seat for the flight I heard this man's voice behind me, terse and pretentious, snapping at the flight attendant for "shoving" his 600 dollar (extremely ugly) plaid sports jacket in the overhead bin. It was a full flight, so space was scarce. "You don't shove a 600 dollar sports coat in there, you place it in" he yelled peevishly. And after it was disposed of in the right way, he proceeded to look to his neighbors for sympathy, complaining about the flight attendant. I rolled my eyes at his shallowness and continued to wait for our departure, which was looking like it was going to be late as it was.

Before we left, a flight attendant walked down the aisle to make sure everything was secure, and noticed that the snobby man behind me was still on his laptop, even though they had made the announcement to turn off all electronic items. She asked him to turn it off and put it away, and he made some bland reply. This flight attendant, however, was not going to be talked down to. She became shorter and shorter, asking him if he was going to be a problem on the flight, telling him that she saw how he treated the other flight attendant about the jacket, snapping that he had better listen. When he gave some rude replies, she said "that was it, you're being taken off this flight" and walked away. Then he got a bit scared, and began complaining to his neighbors about his treatment.

The plane sat there for a few more minutes until we felt that we were pulling forward to the gate, not backward. The Captain announced that we had to return to the gate "to deal with some passenger issues". This got the man a bit angry. The flight attendant returned with a male attendant and a slip of paper, saying that it detailed why he was being taken off, that he "violated FAA regulations". He asked for her name, and she kept declining, and the male flight attendant kept saying "you have to leave now". He walked off in a huff, blustering that this was "outrageous, it's never happened to me before, completely outrageous", and a few people clapped. While this might have been a bit over-the-top, to take the man off for something rather small, the woman in front of me said that he had been making trouble before we boarded and that they had probably anticipated problems with him then. Still, a first for me, and kind of exciting.
_________________________________________________________________________

My next story has to do with my trip into San Francisco with Ryan. We decided that rather than driving his car and having to find parking, we'd buy day passes for the CalTrain (similar to the NJ Transit with New York) and take that in.



We spent the day walking around the downtown area and had dinner at a restaurant on Fisherman's Wharf, and I got to see the sea lions on Pier 39.



After dinner we began our way back to the CalTrain station, taking a trolley part of the way. It was a Sunday, so the train left every hour until midnight except 11:00. It was nearing 9:00 and we still had many blocks to walk, but we thought we might make it in time. As we neared, we realized that we'd probably would miss it by 5 minutes, so rather than running there to try to catch the 9:00 and wear ourselves out, we'd take a leisurely walk back and shop at the grocery store before the next train left.

We got to the station at 9:05 as predicted, and went to check just to make sure the train had left. Ryan tried to open the door only to find it locked, which was strange. A janitor working there told us that the station was closed and we had just missed the last train!! Ryan immediately took out his copy of the schedule, and sure enough, the times he had thought were for the weekend were only for Saturday night! I had to laugh, but he was really worried. We were stuck in downtown San Francisco at 9 o'clock at night, in a not-so-nice part of town, with no way to get home. We had to think of alternatives. We could either find a hotel to stay the night in or take a cab back to Mountain View. We asked a cab driver how much it would cost to drive to Mountain View, but he quoted too much. We stood there looking foolish for a bit, and I reasoned that it would probably cost the same to take a cab back as to rent a room and buy two more tickets for the next day's CalTrain in the morning, and more inconvenient.

Just then, a man walked up to us. "I heard that you missed the train and wanted to get back to Mountain View right? And that cab driver quoted you such and such a cost. Well, I can take you there for less." A bit shady, right? Well, we negotiated a price, and he accepted it and took us to his car. He was a legitimate cab driver, incidentally, and we got back to Mountain View. A bit embarrassing, but we got home regardless, and that's all that matters.

However, the story isn't complete. The next day Ryan biked into work so I could take his car in for lunch and meet him there. I'm ready to go and walk down to his parking spot, only to find his car missing. I walk around the complex, just to see that it wasn't in another spot, and call him to tell him about it. He immediately starts home, telling his boss about the problem, and I have to go tell his manager about it. I call the police and give them the information, and they tell me that they're sending an officer over. I sit tight to wait, so worried, and thinking that I must be back luck for this many bad things to happen to Ryan.

Then Ryan calls me. "I know where the car is," he says. It was parked in the CalTrain parking lot, where we'd left it the day before. In our stupidity, we forgot that in taking a taxi back to his apartment that we'd left his car parked to receive us when we got off the CalTrain we'd missed. So he went to get it, and I called the police back to tell them not to send the officer, and told the apartment manager about it. The worst part was that Ryan had to tell his boss about the whole affair.

New Yawk

Although it's been several days since I left, New York is still on my mind. I had a spectacular time with my lovely Diana, and will be going back there as soon as I am able, or as soon as she'll let me. :)

We spent at least half of every day in Manhattan (she lives in Brooklyn), going to the Met, meeting friends for lunch, spending time drooling over jewelry at Tiffany's or clothing and bags at Macy's. We spent a morning in Soho shopping (my new favorite place). If I ever live in New York that's where it'll be. Her mom is a great cook, so we ate dinner at her place several nights, and the last morning I was there Diana took me to a traditional Chinese brunch place where I was the only person who didn't speak Chinese. It was excellent and very fun. I also learned how to knit, and set a goal to knit a sweater by next Christmas. Let's see how I do!

I always thought that people who thought New York was the only place to live were full of themselves, but last week I understood, at least in part, why that's so.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Yay for the first blog post of the new year! I hope this coming year will be as good (hopefully better) than the last, but I think I'm starting it off right. :) Maybe when I'm more awake I'll post more, and maybe my new year's resolutions, but for now....

I hope everyone had a great new year's!

The Transcontinental Traveller

So, it's official, I bought my tickets and everything! This will be the shortest I'll have been home for Christmas break EVER! I'm going to go visit my lovely New York friends right after New Year's, and then it's out to San Francisco for pretty much the rest of break. The downside is that I'll be back in Pittsburgh pretty early, but that just means that I'll have plenty of time to go grocery shopping and book buying before school starts. :)

This break is suddenly turning out better than I thought. :)

The Pinup and other quizzes

You are Betty Grable

The ulitmate girl next door You're the perfect girl for most guys Pretty yet approachable. Beautiful yet real.

What Famous Pinup Are You?

oh yeah... :)

You Belong in London

A little old fashioned, and a little modern. A little traditional, and a little bit punk rock. A unique woman like you needs a city that offers everything. No wonder you and London will get along so well.

What City Do You Belong In?

I always knew it!

Home again

It's interesting, even though my life has been super busy lately, I haven't felt like anything was worth writing about. It makes me wonder if what I'm doing is really all that important. The semester is over and I'm back home for a while; at least for the holidays. I really want to visit people in January, so hopefully I'll get the opportunity to do that.

Being home has become a bit interesting since my first year in college. I love spending time with my family, but now it's persistently strained. My parents and I are on different sides of the spectrum, and while they "accept" my choices, I'm almost certain that they don't approve of them. It's incredibly frustrating to hear them talk about politics, religion, or current events without inwardly seething because not only do I disagree with them, but if I am bold enough to venture a contrary opinion I'll start a fight and further strain the already tense situation. So I sit quiet and hope that the topic is dropped quickly. I hate doing that, but I hate arguing with them so much more. I know I'll never change their views, and they don't approve of mine, so it's just easier to keep quiet about it. They hate liberals, feminists, environmentalists, basically anyone with a world-view that is different from theirs, and sometimes I think they'd hate me by extension. That's probably a bit strong, but a lot of the time it's true, and although they'd like to think that they're open-minded, they still make me feel so uncomfortable when I'm home.

This is not to say that my parents are bad people; everyone who's met them knows how nice they can be. It's just when you disagree with them on any point that they feel strongly about that it becomes hard.

On another note, Christmas is coming but it doesn't feel like it at all. It's so warm that it looks like it's going to be a rainy, warm Christmas. Yuck, I say. Where'd all the snow go? It's very unseasonable and un-Christmas-cheery.

Let me be a lemming...

And join my friends in filling out a survey. I don't feel like doing work yet anyway.

Two Names You Go By:
1. Lauren
2. Laur (only by my dad though)

Two Things You Are Wearing Right Now:
1. the claddagh ring that never leaves my hand
2. argyle socks

Two Things You Would Want in a Relationship:
1. respect
2. the butterfly happy feeling

Two of Your Favorite Things to do:
1. singing
2. drinking tea and reading Pride and Prejudice for the millionth time

Two Things You Want Very Badly At The Moment:
1. cuddles with boyfriend :)
2. groceries

Two pets you had/have:
1. Miann Jiuh
2. my toy polar bear (my parents didn't like animals for the longest time)

Two people who will fill this out:
1. umm, Maggie, because she loves surveys
2. Ryan, because I'll make him :P

Two things you did last night:
1. watched way too much Sex in the City
2. read about neurophilosophy

Two things you ate today:
1. yummy salad
2. pizza

Two people you Last Talked To:
1. Ryan
2. Steve

Two Things You're doing tomorrow:
1. last dance rehearsal of the semester
2. H&SS Senator meeting!!

Two longest car rides:
1. Pennsylvania to California (clearly not in one contiguous trip)
2. Pennsylvania to Florida

Two Favorite Holidays: I know it's completely unoriginal, but...
1. Thanksgiving
2. Christmas

Two favorite beverages:
1. raspberry iced tea
2. orange juice

The Last Week

It's here, the final week of classes. The semester went surprisingly fast, but nonetheless I am supremely happy to finish this set of classes. Not that I didn't like them, but 22 programming assignments will sicken even the most avid programmer. I have just a little bit of work to go, and I definitely don't want to do it. Usually the final class week is so incredibly piled with work and hectic because of it, but my week is going to be hectic because of meetings. I have a ton of stuff left to do before the week is out, and everything is culminating in the barrage of meetings and events that are scheduled for the next five days. My roommate and I thought of hanging a noose from our ceiling just at the idea of having so much going on, but I think using it will be a last resort. :)

The upside of all this is that my academic work is light for the week. A couple more programming assignments to finish, a presentation to create, and reading for a couple classes is about all I have to do. It's just hard to bring myself to do them when I'm so burnt out and stressing over the million other things I need to get accomplished outside of classwork. Some of it is fun, like shows. And now for the shameless plug:

- Dancer's Symposium is this Friday and Saturday at 8pm in Rangos
- Soundbytes will be caroling around campus for a bit on Tuesday afternoon (and probably during finals week as well)
- the H&SS senators in Student Senate are holding a meeting for their constituents this Wednesday at 6:30 in PH 125C. Come ask questions and see what we're up to. There will be food.
- Soundbytes Winter Concert is the Tuesday of Finals Week, starting at 9pm in UC Connan (I think). Counterpoint, Joyful Noise, and The Originals will also be performing. It'll be a blast, filled with awesome music and, of course, carols. :)

I'm going home!!!

I'm so excited. It's finally Thanksgiving Break!! I'm proud of myself that I managed to get all my work done and now have a bit of time to relax. Not that I'm not going to have work over break; if I don't do work then I'll be screwed for the upcoming week. But I'm really happy I get to go home and be with my family for a little while. And Ryan is coming too!!

In other news, this weekend started out to be the best weekend of the semester, and ended rather badly. Soundbytes had a Thanksgiving dinner that was spectacular. Everyone makes such good food now!! I can remember our first potlucks, when this wasn't the case. The next day I went to the football game (CMU's first playoff game in Gesling Stadium ever) and we won! It was really fun to be there and watch it. I then proceeded to spend the rest of the day relaxing, and arranged holiday music for hours. I was really happy that we had so much to sing for caroling.

And then rehearsal came.... It started out fine, but there are just some problems that had been unresolved and kept building. Long story short, things were said that were offensive and angry. I'm just sorry it had to happen right before we all left for a holiday vacation. I think we'll all be able to work it out, and I appreciate everyone's support more than they know.

Otherwise, I'm going to finish packing and wait for my ride, and enjoy the drive home!!

Have a wonderful, safe, food-filled Thanksgiving!!

Retreat

Today I woke up earlier than I have in months. 7am is earlier than a lot of college students wake up, I thought, but I was amazed at how many people were out an about. I was up to go to a 9 hour retreat for Student Senate, and just like last year, I had been expecting a very different turnout than there actually was. Last year I was the only member-at-large to go to retreat, and this year only 10 other people showed up. However, the select few were the dedicated, and it was much more fun than I had been expecting. Just goes to show never to judge before you try, because it may just surprise you.

We drove two hours to a ropes course and did team-building exercises, and in any other setting what happened would have been considered sexual harassment, given how physical we were with each other. :) However, I've always liked doing those kind of games (e.g. the spiderweb, the human knot, etc.) so I wasn't upset or uncomfortable at all. And it was really nice to get to know some other Senators better; it will make the meetings more fun and go a bit faster because I'm actually better friends with people in the group. And there are some really cool and interesting people in Senate, many with great ideas and ambition that is refreshing in what I feel is sometimes an increasingly jaded atmosphere.

The only downfall of the trip was that 2/3s of the group didn't come, for some reason or another (probably mostly because we had to get up so early), and it would have been beneficial for them to come, however much I prefer a smaller group. Many people in the organization could use some team-building exercises (if you have ever been to a meeting you understand what I'm talking about). People tend to think that their voice is the only important one and don't collaborate.

In other news, Soundbytes had a concert tonight that was really fun. Afterwards Counterpoint performed and then a really cool CMU student band. It was kind of a jazz rock thing that had a lot of potential, I thought, and although the acoustics in Kirr Commons is horrible they still managed to sound really good. And the Truman scholarship is due in about 5 days, which is crazy. I have so much work to do, but I think it's worth it. And soon enough it will be over and Thanksgiving will be here! I can't wait to go home.

A New Era

So, it looks as though both the House and Senate will have a Democratic majority, the first time in my memory. It's an exciting time (for liberals at least). However, I can't help but wonder if things will really change or get any better under the new regime. I feel like in many cases liberals have compromised their values in order to win back Congress and restore their power. But to what end? If we have Democrats who are anti-abortionists (like Bob Casey) or other representatives who are out of step with the majority of liberal thinkers on social, political, or economic issues, will we just have a Republican/conservative Congress in Democratic clothing?

Another problem I see probably just stems from my upbringing in a conservative-Republican household. I grew up believing that liberals were basically feckless, caring more for their media appearance than the interests of the American people. I guess time will tell if my dad was right, but to some extent, if it is true, will it be the product of having a more "moderate"/conservative democratic majority or just the intrinsic nature of Democrats?

Personally I don't like the two-party system that we have. It pigeon-holes people into one category or another, and if they belong to a minority party they are basically voiceless. (I'm not a fan of pigeon-holing in any way). How can complex people with complex and often opposing values be almost forced to support a party or a candidate that they don't believe in because he or she is the best option in comparison to the other?

One more bit about the election. I'm not sure how many people paid attention to the ballot initiatives that were voted on, since the Senate and House elections were so important, but in about seven states, give or take, amendments banning same-sex marriage were passed. Ironically, Arizona was the only state with a same-sex marriage ban on the ballot where it was defeated. In every other state it passed with large majorities. It's frightening to think that in a few years our country could be further divided along the basis of same-sex marriage. Yet another case where religion muddles government: marriage in the legal sense of the word means nothing more than a union of bank accounts and some rights gained, essentially (granted, I could be speaking out of my ass). However, we have forced legal marriages to encompass a larger definition that includes religious tradition, which is not in keeping with the principle of separation of church and state that our forefathers believed in and the Constitution upholds. Clearly high school US history classes are not doing their jobs, and not just in this case either....

Reflections of a College Student in Junior Year

What makes us work so hard to get somewhere? It's a badge of honor to have a sleepless night, and you're in the big time when you've have a few all-nighters in a row. At least at this university, it's almost a competition among students to determine who has the most work, who's most stressed out, who has the least time to themselves. Why do we do it? Why do we sacrifice our time, our money, our sleep, our sanity, even some of our loves to work to satisfy our ambition? And what is it that we ultimately want? Money, prestige, to make a difference, security for the future? I'm seriously doubting whether any of those ends are worth the sacrifices we make now.

There comes a point when you have to draw back and take stock of what you're doing. At least in my case, we get so focused on the little things that we forget about the larger world around us. I stress out about a grade, a project, a meeting, an application, work. I have become so busy and so strained that I almost missed fall. It's my favorite season, and I can't even go outside for an hour and just walk around, enjoying the turning of the leaves, the smell, the crisp air. I don't have time to carve a pumpkin, I don't even have time to get groceries.

I'm worried that I don't have what it takes to make it in my field. I'm scared that I won't get a good internship this summer because I haven't done outstanding things. I'm worried that I'm just not doing enough, that I need to do more to be successful. I'm stretched so thin that I feel like my performance has declined in everything. I used to strive to be the best and now I'm unsure of whether that goal is even feasible for me anymore. Every moment of every day, even when I sleep, I feel tense and strained. I can no longer go to sleep, regardless of the hour.

But more and more I'm beginning to feel like my goals just aren't worth it, that the sacrifices I'm making are too great. Americans used to average about three close relationships; studies have now shown that that number has decreased to two. Most people now have only two close friends. We've lost touch with simple pleasures, for cultivating relationships, for enjoying our surroundings, for taking a break. Taking a break is synonymous with failure. Failure is unacceptable.

The worst part about all of this is that I feel so alone in my disillusionment. Everyone around me is successful and happy. They are sleeping well, cultivating new relationships, having personal time, enjoying their work, doing well, and looking forward to the future. They see prospects in their futures that I don't see in mine. I'm jealous of my friends' success, happiness, and most of all, direction in their lives. I have two majors but I still don't feel like I've learned enough; I'm involved in a lot of different activities, both academic and recreational, but I still don't know what I want or where I'm going.

It makes it worse to feel that because of all these inadequacies, regardless of whether they are real or perceived, I'm a total failure in comparison to my peers. As much as I might have just said my ambition isn't worth the sacrifices I've been making, it's hard to let it go. It's hard to fail.

California Trip

I <3 California vacations. I had so much fun! Not least because I got to spend it with Ryan. That made it so much better. I went to Google for lunch (which was pretty good, especially because it was free) and got a tour of some of the places Ryan frequents, including the two pool tables he likes. :P We went out for a wonderful dinner in downtown Mountain View, which isn't saying much since it's about a street long. It was this new Spanish place where the service was good and the food better.

The next day we went to the beach, and drove over the mountains which felt like a cross between the Mediterranean and West Virginia. There were a lot of bikers, most of whom had to be in incredible shape to bike those hills. We also went and saw The Departed, which was really violent and disturbing but incredibly good.

Here are some pictures of the beach that I took.

California Vacation 1

I feel the need to blog

Ok, so right now I am so wired it's crazy. I normally don't drink all that much caffeine (usually a soda now and then) so when I say that I've had a pepsi, a cup of coffee, and an energy drink, you can deduce two things: 1) that I'm so crazy jittery that I could run for hours and 2) I have so much work to do it shouldn't even be legal.

Granted, maybe I'm making too much of this, maybe I'm playing up the whole "OMG no one is busier than me and I'm going crazy it's crazy" thing, but hey, a girl only gets to this a few times a year (if you're lucky and don't go to CMU). I actually shouldn't even be writing now I have so much other stuff I could be writing, like the 5 more essays I have to get out of these tired fingers before tomorrow morning. (I'm not joking either) To put into context, these essays aren't meant to be long, but put enough of them together, and you're bound to be a little jittery too. I've already written 7, just for reference.

But it all pays off. Once I'm done with this stuff, I get to crash for a couple hours (hopefully) and go to class, pack, and be on my merry way to California! It will be such a release. Whew.

Long Time

It's been quite a while since I last posted. There hasn't been too much to report. It's just been business as usual, kind of overwhelmed and a bit frustrated and burned out, but I suppose that's usual for your third year. Some of the things I've been keeping busy with:

- work (of course)
- first CMU ACLU meeting, which was relatively successful
- the Chili Cook-Off, which Soundbytes made really good chili for, although we didn't win
- a lot of reading and writing
- trying not to be down-trodden by professors who suck and are incredibly cruel (in a personal way)
- waiting for midsemester, when I get a respite

Overall, I'm doing okay, although I could use some cheery words to brighten my day. I haven't been getting much of that lately. Just a whole lot of unwelcome criticism. Such is the life of a college student, right?

Just as a reminder: remember to VOTE on November 7th. It's an incredibly important election. There's my two cents on politics (although I could write volumes on the subject).

19 days!

It's official. I just bought my ticket to go to California over midsemester break. Now I will be completely insufferable and unliveable-with for the next three weeks in anticipation. :) Well, maybe not totally, but I'm really excited.

Also, what is this and why was it passed? What has this country come to? This country is a mockery of what it once was, and could be, with things like this happening in our legislature, and it needs to be stopped.

Whew, ok, I've stepped off my soapbox now. I don't say political things that often in this blog, but every so often something is so egregiously wrong that it just needs to be stated. And this is one of those times.

And I thought this year was going to be easy...

But I was wrong. Granted, I love it. But for once I'd like to have a week (or weekend) completely and totally to myself so that I can watch tv, read a recreational book, catch up on some homework, or anything!! I think I need to revamp my time management skills. They got kinda mutilated this summer, when I didn't have anything to do. Man, I was a bum! And I don't know how I got through this summer with my sanity. .... And I feel like a broken record. That's it, NO MORE complaining about work.

In other news, Soundbytes is singing in the Relay for Life talent show this Friday night. Come show some support! It'll be in Gesling Stadium. The event goes all night, but the talent show is from 8-9pm. Hope to see you there!!

Oh, and I <3 running. :)

New Blog Format

I just switched to the new beta of Google's blogger, and I really like it. It's a lot easier to personalize (especially for non-technical people like me). In switching I decided that I wanted to change the whole layout of my blog, because I was sick of the old one. So enjoy the new look!

In other news, today I'm being voted on for Student Senate. Wish me luck! I really hope I get it. I could do so much good. :)

My life on speed

So, someone who reads this blog must have noticed that something happened to me at the end of August, because I stopped posting. I find it very humorous that the lazy slow summertime yielded more blog posts than the current helter-skelter pandemonium of my current state. I have way more to say right now, but much less time to say it. Ah, so it goes...

I have been so busy with things that today was a marked contrast from the previous three weeks. I finally got a day to veg without feeling guilty (or missing some meeting). This is my first weekend to myself, and I LOVE it. Granted, I still have tons of work, and Soundbytes callbacks, and grading, and sleep to catch up on, but I get to make my schedule, rather than have it dictated for me by the myriad meetings I attend every week. Who knew my life could get so packed?

Last night I went to an awesome party. Unfortunately I couldn't stay later than midnight because I had to get up early for Soundbytes callbacks, which were fun, and sad in a way. I hate getting to know people only to have to give them a rejection, because everyone is nice and friendly and has some quality that makes them cool, but the sheer fact is that 90% of them won't make it. If we weren't that selective our group would be up to 50 people by now. Talk about a choir!

The rest of the day I spent vegged in front of the tv (productive, I know). I'll go do some reading now, or programming or something. I just really needed this time to chill, because next week will be another hold-on-by-the-fingernails week. And tomorrow is a major work day. I have to hold 3-4 hours of Soundbytes callbacks, grade, program, read, start my research and do stuff for work, update my resume, and look into the Truman Scholarship (which will be one hell of a commitment). I'm not sure that I'll have time, but I'm going to try to make time for it. 30,000 dollars for grad school? Sounds good to me.

Switching into high gear

Oi!

That's the word of the hour, the day, the week, the year. I've had a week of class and already I'm behind on my homework, tired, and stressed. Granted, not all of that has to do with school-related stuff. I mean, I'm only taking four classes.... but I'm doing research with SDS.... and I'm TA-ing.... and I'm still director of Soundbytes.... and I work for the ACLU still.... and I'm in Student Senate.... and I'm choreographing for DS.... and I have to go to a funeral on Saturday.... and Ryan just left after visiting for a weekend..............

Hence the Oi!

However, once things quiet down (IF things quiet down) I think I'm going to have a great semester, and a great year. I was hoping to take it easy this year, but given everything else I'm doing, or planning on doing, that probably won't happen. And it's looking like I won't have an easy Senior year either, since I'm seriously considering the 5th year master's program in public policy, and that starts in your Senior year.

On a lighter note, Ryan's visit was spectacular, and I got to see a ton of him and a lot of his friends, which was really nice. I ate better than I have in a long time, but I think that was because I was eating with him, and company makes food so much better. We went to Frick Park, and to half off, and visited Rolli and such, and hung out with some Soundbytes people. The only downside to this weekend was that I got behind on work that I should have been doing, but I can make it up. At least he helped me on my programming (I'm gonna miss having him around for that). :)

Ok, bedtime. The morrow brings much busy-ness and stress. But I can handle it. If I keep telling myself that, it's bound to be true, right?

Back in the 'burgh!

I'm back in Pittsburgh, and although home is fun, I've missed being at CMU when people are here! I love love LOVE my apartment (I have air conditioning, beat that!) and the location is great.

I'm excited about classes and work and everything. I'm still doing research, and I got accepted to be a TA for Stats I. I think I'll probably take the research for credit, since I can't take 5 classes and work 20 hours a week, with all my other activities as well.

In other news, Ryan is coming to visit in less than a week!! I'm so excited. Luckily for me, I'll be so busy that I won't have time to get antsy. :)

last day at home :(

I've been home for less than 2 weeks, and it's already time to go back to CMU. It makes me really sad, because I really like being home, and I wish I was here for a longer period of time. I like hanging out with my brother and my parents.

I went to visit a good friend of mine a couple days ago, which was great. I hadn't seen her in a year, and we had a lot of fun just hanging out and watching Carmen Electra's Aerobic Striptease (apparently it is a really good workout, but it's also extremely funny).

I don't get to come home again until Thanksgiving, but I'm hoping to at least come for another weekend so I can see the marching band play. It's my brother's last year in it, and I want to be able to support him, and see how cool the show is this year.

Incidentally, the weather here has also been spectacular, and it shows off the best side of the area. I never really knew how pretty my hometown was before, so it makes me happy that I have finally realized it.

However sad I am that I'm not going to be home for longer, and the fact that moving really sucks, I'm excited to be back at CMU and making my new apartment homey. I hope this year will be fun. I know it will be exhausting and busy. Not only do I have a research position and a full class schedule, but I just found out that I got accepted to be TA for Stats (which I really want to do) and I want to join even more groups than I was in the previous two years, and get more involved in stuff. I don't know what I'm going to do. Lauren just doesn't have time for all the things she wants to do. :( Hopefully it will all work out.

In the meantime, I get to be busy and productive and hopefully able to enjoy the most of this fall (I love seasons). Hopefully some of you people out there who read this blog will be able to enjoy it with me. :P

HOME!

I'm finally home for a week and a half, and I'm so glad. I missed being home and with family. I have plans for this week too. I'm trying to clean out my wardrobe, since I still have clothing from middle school in it (I haven't grown much), although I pretty much haven't worn them since then. It's amazing how these things accumulate. My mom also wants me to help her paint the dining room, so that should be fun.... Otherwise, it's relax, sleep, read, exercise a bit, and enjoy the time I've got with my family. The next time I'll get to see them for more than a few days will be Christmas.

Update

So, I hate packing. Yep, this sucks a lot. Not only do I have to pack and unpack twice during the year normally, but because I lived in a sublet for the summer, I have to do it twice as much. I'm currently trying to pack, and in doing so I'm realizing exactly how much stuff I have. Especially clothing.

The worst part about the clothing thing is that I a) have too much of it and b) it all either doesn't fit me anymore or very soon won't. And I really like a lot of what I have. Stupid losing weight. I guess I'll just keep them at home in case I gain it all back again, and in the meantime, go shopping!

last day of work!

Tomorrow is officially my last day of work for the summer!!! I'm so excited, although I'm sure I'll be even more excited tomorrow night. Today was my last official day of work as an intern for the ACLU, although I have a feeling I'll be keeping in touch and working with them more than I had initially anticipated. I really loved working there, and I think it was not only a very beneficial experience from a "future plans" view, but it was just good in and of itself.

So now, on to packing and HOOOOOME!!! For a week, anyway.

Work at its best

I need the summer to be over. I need to go home. I need to do SOMETHING.

I'm so bored. My elbows have sores on them from where I rest them on the table all day.

It's too hot to do anything. It's ennui at its best and worst.

I hate feeling useless.

That's all.

Hot

So who was sooo smart and thought in June, "I don't need an air conditioner, it's too expensive". Yeah, it's been stifling for the past week, and nearly unbearable the past two days. Upper 90s, around 100 with the humidity, and Lauren doesn't have an air conditioner. It's looking to be like this for the next week or so (well, it'll drop a bit, but still be incredibly hot), so I'm basically going to spend as much time as possible in air conditioned spaces, and come home for as little as possible.

This of course, means that I can't eat my food very much (I'm not hungry for it either), so I'll have a ton of food left over to find something to do with before I leave in a week! I'm thinking the earlier the better. Anything to get out of this oppressive heat.

2-0

First off, thanks to everyone who wished me a happy birthday yesterday. It was really nice to hear from you all. :)

My family just left for home, as they came to visit me to celebrate the big 2-0. On Friday we went to breakfast with some of my relatives, then went to visit my uncle in the hospital. He recently found out that he has pancreatic cancer, and it's fairly advanced. That wasn't too fun. But enough about that. Then we went to check into our hotel (yeah, we stayed in a hotel in Pittsburgh, although I live here. It made it more vacation-y). Then we went shopping at the Southside Works, where my mother spent way too much for clothes for me (they are extremely pretty though). After that, we went out for indian food. It was their first time, and I'm happy to say they enjoyed it.

On my birthday we went to the Andy Warhol Museum, which is great. Then we went to the Strip and bought food, and I made an interesting discovery. A guy who works at Fudgie Wudgie (the fudge place at the Strip) knows fairly well one of my best friends from elementary school! How wild is that?

My parents took me out to dinner at the Grand Concourse, one of the best restaurants in Pittsburgh. It's in Station Square at the old train station (eighty foot stained glass windows, marble staircase, the works). It was... superb. Mmm, my mouth is watering....

Today I took them to Phipps, which they had never been to. All in all, a very very wonderful, memorable birthday. I really loved it, and I can't wait to go back home in two weeks!

Birthday Weekend!!

My family is currently en route to Pittsburgh to visit me for my birthday. They've decided to make a sort of holiday out of it, so we're staying at a hotel for two nights and doing fun things in the area.

Unfortunately our plans are a bit up in the air because my uncle recently (as in less than two weeks ago) found out that he has a malignant tumor in his abdominal region. He's in the hospital and not doing very well, so we're told, and so we're going to visit him and wait for more concrete news of his condition.

Otherwise, it's HI HO! I'm going to be 20 and have two more weeks of work. Thank goodness.

Word of the Day

INSIPID

Pronunciation: in-'si-p&d
Function: adjective
Etymology: French & Late Latin; French insipide, from Late Latin insipidus, from Latin in- + sapidus savory, from sapere to taste -- more at SAGE
1 : lacking taste or savor : TASTELESS <insipid food>
2 : lacking in qualities that interest, stimulate, or challenge : DULL, FLAT <insipid prose>

Definition number two really sums up what I’m feeling today about my job. Yes, thank you Lauren for choosing a profession that takes no interest in anyone with less than a master’s degree, even when there's no difference in knowledge…

Swing!

So, swing dancing is so awesome. I went to this place tonight and it was absolutely wonderful. They had an AMAZING live band and a bunch of people who knew how to dance pretty well. A few of them knew how to dance REALLY well, but most of them were better than me. It really makes me want to go and learn more. I think partner dancing is awesome. Too bad my built-in partner is 3000 miles away.... poo on him.

Road Trip details

Finally, I have the time and will to detail a bit of my road trip with y'all. So here are the highlights:

We drove through Kentucky and Illinois and Indiana to get to St. Louis, Missouri, which was a lot of fun. We went to this microbrewery that had the best ribs I'd ever eaten. A lot of the food was organic, and almost all came from local farmers or their own garden. Sweet.

We drove through Missouri and half of Kansas, and it was actually kinda pretty. Missouri is a nice state to drive through, rolling green hills and all. Kansas was a hoot, because half the time driving we tuned into AM stations sponsored by Christian Coalition Family groups and such, and listening the radio stations talk about how to raise your kids "in God's light" or how to deal with non-believers was... illuminating, and often times aggravating.

When we got to Colorado, it, for a long time, looked exactly like Kansas. Very flat, very farm-y. Unfortunately it was extremely overcast and rainy, so we didn't get to see the Rocky Mountains upon approach. However, we stayed there during the night and in the morning hiked out to a panorama point to see the mountains. It was gorgeous.

We drove through the Rockies that day, which was really fun and beautiful. I only wish we could have spent more time there. Then we drove into Utah.

One thing about Utah. Forget what you may have heard about it, it is one of the prettiest states I've ever been to. Full of canyons and mountains and valleys and high altitude desert, it is one spectacular place. We spent several days there, driving through, stopping at scenic overlooks and being amazed by the landscape. We stayed at this one amazing park (Dead Horse Point State Park), which had lovely campsites and in the morning, we hiked to watch the sun rise at Dead Horse Point, which gives a 270-degree view of the canyons and arches that go for miles.

We also visited the Grand Canyon's North Rim, which was lovely and a place I'd want to stay, as it had a hotel of sorts right on the rim. In order to get there we drove through a fire-damaged area. A recent forest fire charred hundreds of acres of forest around the road that leads to the rim, and it was cool to see the charred trunks. It was particularly sad, because the minute you see it, you understand that life will grow back, and fast, and that often it's necessary for these kinds of fires to purge the forest of overgrowth and underbrush.

My favorite part of the trip was going to see the sand dunes in Coral Pink Sands State Park. There are these huge salmon-colored sand dunes in the middle of the mountainy area in Utah, and it was unbelieveable. Soooo beautiful and almost unreal.

We drove into Nevada (which feels like another planet) and drove past Las Vegas, which is the weirdest city in the entire world. It sits in amongst these barren mountains and is so gawdy and crazy and feels like it shouldn't be there because of all the desert that surrounds it. Then we drove past Lake Mead, which is another surreal place. It's this huge vibrant blue lake i n the middle of a desert, with no vegetation around it whatsoever. It was created after the Hoover Dam was built, backing up the Colorado River. The Hoover Dam was cool to see, although there were a lot of people there, and there was a lot of construction, as they're making a bridge byway in view of the dam, so people can get a better look and also eliminate some of the security that comes with driving over the dam.

That night we drove across the Mojave Desert to get to California. The next day we drove up the middle of the state (very deserty and bright) to get to the Sierra Nevadas. We camped among the sequoias and sugarpine trees that night. There were more mosquitos than I had ever seen before.

We got to see the sequoias, which are unbelieveable and beautiful. Ryan bought a seed that he's going to plant to get one to grow. Then we drove to Mountain View.

Mountain View feels like Pleasantville in its cleanliness, newness, and brightness. The weather is temperate and always sunny, the streets are wide and tree-lined, and the buildings look new and well cared-for. We moved Ryan into his apartment, which is cute and will serve him well I think. A day later I left. I think he'll be very happy there. There seems to be a large younger population, and it's a very tech-savvy place (Silicon Valley and all).

Well, that's about it. Apparently during Scouts Ryan's leader-person had a game called Thorns and Roses, in which you told your favorite and worst experience on the trip. My rose was Coral Pink Sands State Park, and for good reason. My thorn (other than having to leave Ryan) was that we had such long days on the road we usually were too tired to do anything but sleep after we got to the campsite, and we often didn't leave early enough to get into camp before dusk.

Overall though, the trip was pleasant and fun and well worth the 10 days it took to drive.

back....

... after the longest vacation I've taken in a while (Hawaii doesn't count since I had to leave early). I'll post more about the trip tomorrow, since I'm too tired tonight, but suffice it to say that I had a really good time, and that it sucked to leave Ryan, but that I'm ok, and it was really fun.

And it's fricking HOT here. I thought 120 degrees in Nevada was bad.... :P

Tomorrow!!... I mean, TODAY!!

So, today in approximately 17 hours, I will be leaving for Cincinnati to begin my 11 day road trip across the country. I'm really really excited. I'll be driving with Ryan, his mom, and his mom's boyfriend to send him off to California. Although it's not the greatest reason ever (stupid Google ::grumble grumble::), I'm planning on having a really good time. Here's a list of some of the things I'll be doing.

. Grand Canyon (North Rim this time)
. Rocky Mountains
. Las Vegas
. Mojave Desert
. Sequoia National Park
. LOTS of camping!
. moving Ryan in to his new place... on the other side of the continent...

The route (for me) is: Pennsylvania, Ohio, Missouri, Kansas, Colorado, Utah, Arizona, Nevada, California. Thursday to the following following Monday. 12 days. EXCITING.

I will bring back lots of pictures. Not that many people care. But some might!

Long Weekend, Long Post

I haven't updated in a while because Ryan came for the weekend, and we were busy. :) It was nice to have someone around to do things with, especially someone as pleasant and energetic as Ryan. We went to see the movie Water (which everyone should see). It's a really really good Indian film about the widow houses in certain parts of India. And it's a love story. And it has hot Indian actors in it. We also went to Frick Park and walked around, which was really fun because I love Frick and I got to show Ryan all the cool places in it. Then we made pottery. There's this really cute store on Forbes that sells pottery you can paint any way you like. I painted Ryan a bowl with a panorama of a beach in Hawaii we found, and he painted me a pot for my orchids.

On Saturday we went to a 4th of July party my family was having in Avella. We spent the day in the pool, hanging out with my family, and eating a ton of food. I got really sunburned, and my skin is sooooo itchy. And then we got lost on our way back to Pittsburgh. We somehow missed BOTH the exits: one from the south approach, and then again from the north approach. Silly us.
On Sunday I felt like crap because of my sunburn, and it was super hot outside, so we didn't do very much. We went to Phipps and went out to dinner, then met up with an old Soundbyte and went out to dinner again. It was really fun to see her again.

Ryan just left this morning, and although I miss him already, I get to see him again in 4 days when we go on our cross-country road trip. :)

And now we get to it. Why am I writing a blog entry at 11:20 on a Monday morning? Well, why, thank you for asking! My job feels like a waste of time. My boss decides to email me on a Sunday night, telling me that no one will be in the office on Monday, and that I should just continue working on whatever I was working on. However, the last time I worked, I was working on my ability to nap whilst sitting at work.... She hasn't given me work in weeks, and I've just been asking my other sort-of boss for work. I haven't met my 15 hours a week for the last couple weeks, and I don't get paid a lot. It's my only job, and not working the full time means I don't get that money, which means I don't eat. I'm never informed of anything, and I never get anything interesting to do. It's just busy work, and not even important stuff at that. I feel like I'm wasting my time, and all my talent and intelligence and anything else I have is going to waste. I could do so much more, and I wish they would realize it. I wish my job was managed better, and wasn't so haphazard. I wish I was valued. Oh well. Maybe it will get better.... maybe not.

Waiting.......

For the past week almost, I've been waiting very impatiently for the arrival of Ryan's car. Yes, I know, I'm sure he has been even more impatient to get it, but the car signifies the time that he can come and visit me. The later its arrival is postponed, the less time he'll get to spend here with me. So, it's Monday, and tomorrow is the very last day of waiting. The dealership guaranteed it would be here no later than tomorrow, which means Ryan could get here as early as Wednesday. However, I don't particularly trust them. If it doesn't come tomorrow, all hell breaks loose....

Stay tuned for further updates.

New Backpack!!

A few days ago I read this post on misc.market. Some guy was selling sleeping bags and other gear. Come to find out it was Explorer's Club gear. Anyway, I bought a sleeping bag and a backpack for 60 dollars total! Given that new, it would have cost me over 400 dollars on the low end, I think I got a good deal. Here are some pictures of the backpack.

Phipps Butterflies

I went to Phipps last week, and every summer they have a butterfly exhibit. I managed to get some good pictures of them.

Internet Blues

So, uhh, yeah, I've been "stealing" internet from my neighbors for a little while, just until I get internet of my own. Unfortunately that date has been pushed back for several weeks because the person who needs to set it up is never home, so doesn't really care. And the fact that the internet I'm stealing is unreliable and for some reason isn't working at the moment means that I'm at work at 5 to 6:00, writing a blog entry and not going home. Let's hope things get rectified soon. It's not good to let an internet addict go without for very long...

In other news, I miss Ryan. Yeah, I know, it's old news, but hey, it's a daily occurrence.

Bored, anyone?

So, this is the time when my lovely friends who read this blog can answer a question for me. I'm in Pittsburgh for the summer, and I'm basically at a loss on what to do with myself. CMU teaches you how to think or work under pressure, etc. but it strips your ability to have fun. I spent a few days sitting around going, what now? and just kind of wandering aimlessly around because I don't have any work to do. Pathetic, I know. So I wondered: just what do people do with their time now that they actually have some of it free? Feel free to answer in the comments section.....

etc.

I have nothing major to report, but here are some things I've been doing that might be of interest. :) I'm starting to get used to having free time. Last week I kinda just wandered around and didn't know what to do with myself. I've started to work out again, after about 6 weeks of hiatus due to finals, being home, and being semi-injured. I'm planning on reworking my body so I can be stronger, slimmer, and have a better self-image. We'll see if that happens. I'm off to a good start though: today I ran about 2 and a half miles, stretched, and did some upper body workout. I'll probably end up replacing workouts like that with dancing some days, once I choose a song to choreograph for next semester's DS.

I fell in love with the Greyhound this weekend. Well, not really in love, because it's still frustrating and such, but it was really peaceful, and the driver's are nice and funny, and there's a camaraderie among the passengers that is refreshing. Not to mention the ease at which I can travel. However, I think this liking only applies to short trips, because any longer than 5 hours I think I'd start to hate it.

I love my job at the ACLU. It's the first time I've found people who are truly passionate about what they do. It makes it fun to come into work, and I actually feel like I'm making a difference, like I count and that I'm a valued intern who is doing work that is necessary. Not so my research position, which requires virtually no upper brain function and has nothing to do with research that I can see. Plus I do everything alone, and it can get lonely. Luckily I can bring my laptop, so I talk online (who'll care?) and take breaks. It's nice to have the familiarity of your own settings on a computer, and the mobility to work anywhere. Hopefully I'll earn enough trust by the end of the summer that I'll do something more than scan 500+ papers and articles into pdf.... something like, I don't know, research? At least it pays and it's good for my resume.

In other news, my roommate found an old Macbook, one that was discontinued in 1992, and it still kinda works. I mean, it doesn't boot the whole way, the screen is broken, and it she's trying to get it to stay on, but hey, it's a novelty!

And... today marks a year and a half since Ryan and I started dating. I thought I'd like to share. :)

Cincinnati

I'm in Cincy for the weekend, visiting Ryan. So far it's been really fun, and today we're going to buy a car... for him, of course. I have to leave tomorrow, which is sad, because I like Cincinnati. But I get to go back to what is probably my favorite city, and that's ok. :)

Comment section?

Ok, so I just looked at my comments section in this blog, and I seem to have been spammed by someone leaving the same or similar comments anonymously. If whoever is doing it is reading this, please stop, and if anyone knows how to fix it, let me know in a real comment. Thanks.

In Pittsburgh!

I've moved into my apartment for the summer, and I think it should be a good time. After I finish unpacking, that is, which I still have to do. However, I'm going to postpone that for a little while and take a visit to Cincinnati. :) It should be a good time.

Boredom Part 4

Last one for the night!! I promise!!

45 of the most random things you probably never needed to know about someone
whats your name spelt backwards?:	nerual
What did you do last night?:	I slept
The last thing you downloaded onto your computer?:	season 1 of lost
Have you ever licked a 9 volt battery?:	nope
Last time you swam in a pool?:	oh man, it's been years I think
What are you wearing?:	a gray t-shirt from DS and black capris
How many cars have you owned?:	so far, none
Type of music you dislike most?:	rap
Are you registered to vote?:	yep
Do you have cable?:	everywhere I live
What kind of computer do you use?:	IBM thinkpad (my baby!!)
Ever made a prank phone call?:	when I was, like, 9
You like anyone right now?:	yeppers, Ryan
Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?:	when I was younger (like I'm that old!) but I'm kinda scared now
Furthest place you ever traveled?:	now I'd say Hawaii
What's your favorite comic strip?:	Calvin and Hobbes
Do u know all the words to the national anthem?:	yep, I used to sing it at basketball games
Shower, morning or night?:	morning
Best movie you've seen in the past month?:	I've been too busy to see a new movie, but the last good one was V for Vendetta
Favorite pizza toppings?:	pineapple and ham
Chips or popcorn?:	CHEESE popcorn
What cell phone provider do you have?:	Verizon
Have you ever smoked peanut shells?:	lol, I didn't even know that was possible
Have you ever been in a beauty pageant?:	::sigh:: yes, my mother made me
Orange Juice or apple?:	orange
Who were the last people you sat at lunch with?:	Ryan
favorite chocolate bar?:	ooo, Reese's FastBreak (do they still make them?)
Who is your longest friend and how long?:	I guess that would be Jackie, and over 10 years
Last time you ate a homegrown tomato?:	too long
Have you ever won a trophy?:	yes, for cheerleading and for the Community Days (beauty) pageant
Favorite arcade game?:	pacman
Ever ordered from an infomercial?:	nope, I don't buy into them, although I've been tempted
Sprite or 7-UP?:	7-UP
Have you ever had to wear a uniform to school/work?:	yep, when I worked at the Hilton
Last thing you bought at Walgreens?:	Well, Rite-Aid, and it was sunblock
Ever thrown up in public?:	yes, probably more than once
Would you prefer being a millionaire or finding true love?:	finding true love
Do you believe in love at first sight?:	yes
SPONGEBOB OR JIMMY NEUTRON?:	Spongebob of course!
Did you have long hair as a young kid?:	down to my waist, and then my dad took me to the hair dresser's and I came back with a bowl cut.
What message is on your voicemail machine?:	Ryan's
Where would you like to go right now?:	to Red River Gorge
Whats the name of your pet?:	Miann Jiuh (pronounced Min-jee)
What kind of back pack do you have, and what's in it?:	a very old Jansport, and it is storing other bags
What do you think about most?:	the future (it's a blessing and a curse)
Take this survey | Find more surveys You've been totally Bzoink*d

Boredom Part 3

Last one!! Maybe...

#1 COUNTDOWN SURVEYY.
[TEN.] SONGS THAT YOUU ADORE.
1o. -:	Glen Phillips - Everything But You
o9. -:	Vienna Teng - Gravity
o8. -:	Nickel Creek - Jealous of the Moon
o7. -:	Hey Mama - Black Eyed Peas
o6. -:	Michael Jackson - The Way You Make Me Feel
o5. -:	Massive Attack - Inertia Creeps
o4. -:	Dave Matthews Band - Two Step
o3. -:	Copeland - Appalachian Spring
o2. -:	Rusted Root - Send Me On My Way
o1. -:	Stravinsky - Firebird Suite
[NiNE.] PEOPLE YOU'D DiE FOR.
o9. -:	Maybe it's
o8. -:	selfish,
o7. -:	but
o6. -:	I'd
o5. -:	only
o4. -:	die
o3. -:	for
o2. -:	Ryan
o1. -:	My brother
[EiGHT.] OF YOUR iDOLSZ.
o8. -:	the entire Nickel Creek band
o7. -:	Monet
o6. -:	Cicero
o5. -:	Gandhi
o4. -:	Madeleine Albright
o3. -:	Sandra Day O'Connor
o2. -:	Jane Austen (for her books)
o1. -:	Vienna Teng
[SEVEN.] iNSiDE JOKES BETWEEN FRiENDS.
o7. -:	Masturbating furiously (long story)
o6. -:	Not doing drugs here guys!
o5. -:	never be without milk in Rolli's house
o4. -:	cheese!!!
o3. -:	my goodies???
o2. -:	YAY SNOW!!!
o1. -:	ancient hawaiians, man
[SiX.] THiNGS ABOUT YOURSELF THAT YOUU LOVE.
o6. -:	My lips
o5. -:	my voice
o4. -:	my ability to fit into what would be an uncomfortable situation
o3. -:	my future
o2. -:	my eyes
o1. -:	my feet
[FiVE.] THiNGSZ THAT PiSS YOUU OFF.
o5. -:	messes
o4. -:	dirty dishes
o3. -:	war
o2. -:	my parents' political close-mindedness
o1. -:	not being appreciated, and seeing other people being unappreciated
[FOUR.] MOViES THAT KiCKED ASS.
o4. -:	V for Vendetta
o3. -:	Serenity
o2. -:	The Philadelphia Story
o1. -:	Batman Begins
[TWO.] THiNGS iN THE PAST THAT YOUU REGRET.
o2. -:	being so aloof
o1. -:	not practicing piano more
[ONE.] WiSH.
o1. -:	To make a difference
Take this survey | Find more surveys You've been totally Bzoink*d