Moved

I loved this witty and altogether sweet short film.

SIGNS

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

My friend sent me this, and I found it hilarious (and very accurate at times). However, he revised the interpretations of the lines for men, and I like them much better. So here is the edited version:

Top 10 Rejection Lines Given by Women (and what they actually mean..)

10. I think of you as a brother. (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in “Deliverance”)
9. There’s a slight difference in our ages. (You are one Jurassic geezer)
8. I’m not attracted to you in ‘that’ way (You are the ugliest dork I’ve ever laid eyes upon)
7. My life is too complicated right now. (I don’t want you spending the whole night or else you
may hear phone calls from all the other guys I’m seeing)
6. I’ve got a boyfriend (who’s really my male cat and a half gallon of Ben & Jerry’s)
5. I don’t date men where I work (Hey bud, I wouldn’t even date you if you were in the same solar system, much less the same building)
4. It’s not you, it’s me (It’s not me, it’s you)
3. I’m concentrating on my career (Even something as boring and unfulfilling as my job is better than dating you.)
2. I’m celibate. (I’ve sworn off *only* the men like you.)

…..and the #1 rejection line given by women (and what it actually means)

1. Let’s be friends. (I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and have sex with.

Top 10 Rejection Lines Given by Men (and what they actually mean...)

10. I think of you as a sister (I've thought about doing you, but I just can't picture it in my head. As I tell you this right now, I'm thinking about doing you...it still ain't workin' out)
9. There’s a slight difference in our ages. (I can't picture you as a MILF)
8. I’m not attracted to you in ‘that’ way. (You’re ugly)
7. My life is too complicated right now. (You talk too much)
6. I’ve got a girlfriend (You’re ugly) - I dunno why a guy would ever say this if the girl was hot
5. I don't date women where I work (You're ugly)
4. It’s not you, it’s me (My girlfriend is on to us)
3. I’m concentrating on my career (You talk way too damn much)
2. I'm celibate (No man would ever use this)

…..and the #1 rejection line given by men (and what it actually means)

1. Let’s be friends (After many attempts at thinking about doing you, in a variety of different positions, and scenarios, I have failed on behalf of my gender and must now place you into the un-doable category) - also see "I think of you as a sister"

Scuba Training - Days One and Two

A long-overdue continuation of the travel tales...

Scuba Training – Day One

Monday dawned bright and already warm. We woke up individually, and all scattered to find some breakfast before we walked the short distance to the Cairns Dive Centre (CDC), where we’d be doing our training. After meeting our trainer, a swarthy red-headed South African named Renaldo, we filled out paperwork and waited for everyone else to trickle in. The group numbered about 15, mostly Brits with a smattering of Germans, a Norwegian, an Aussie, a Dutch girl with whom we made great friends with, and a few more people. The morning was spent in theory, the afternoon in the pool, where we got into gear and had our first play underwater. I wasn’t sure if my ears would hold up; I was getting pain when I tried to dive past a few meters. Luckily, I learned to equalize quickly, and the problem subsided.

Scuba itself is a great experience. The gear is relatively simple to use, and while heavy when you first put it on, obviously loses its weight on your shoulders when you enter the water. The pool was tiny and cramped with 15 people in large metal gear and fins trying to swim around in it.

After a long day in the pool and classroom, we were able to get back to our hostel, take a kip, and then head out for dinner. A local pub had a nice deal for hostel-goers that provided a free meal with purchase of a drink. The food was plain but good and plentiful, and the vibe was just right. It made it a great and inexpensive way to eat dinner in Cairns while we were staying there.

Scuba Training – Day Two

Tuesday started even early than Monday, with more classroom and pool training. We learned new skills, and ended the day with a written exam (I passed) and diving physical to make sure we were healthy enough to endure the rigors of a dive. We ate at the same pub as the previous time, meeting with Berdien, the Dutch girl who was also doing the training course. We went to bed early again, as the next morning we were heading out to the Reef!